Circus Freak.

So, is she yours?


Perhaps,they are thrown off her bone straight hair and light complexion in contrast to my kinky 'fro and dark complexion.

Brown-eyed babe is 50% African-American, 25% Italian and 25% Irish. But essentially she is biracial. Half black. Half white. However, she is not the one whom people see as abnormal. I disappoint them by not responding, "No, she is just my charge. I'm the nanny." Instead I give them a simple definative, "Yes."

So, she looks like her dad then?


Such a polite way of asking if he is of a different race. To this inquiry I responded quite cheekily, "Yes, she has his ears.", which is the truth.

I hope that her peers are less put off by her mixed heritage. And then there is the whole can of worms with regard to her own sense of identity. It has been my observation that most kids with a black parent identify themselves as black. Not that she has to identify with one or the other, but we all know how society loves to try and place people into boxes. What if I were to enroll her in an Irish dance class, would she be regarded as an outsider due to her darker skin tone? I wish I could just pass these worries off on blue-eyed babe but his sense of race is a bit murky as it is with regards to black and white. When we lived in Massachusetts, I had such anxiety about her only being surrounded by her white family members. I was quite resentful of it actually. Now that the tables are turned, I have anxiety about her not seeing her white family members. I guess we shall cross the racial identity bridge when we come to it. However, that does not mean that I won't be fretting about a possible furture identity crisis in the meantime.

What's the Story, Morning Glory?

It has been ages since my last blog.

Two months later and birthdays are still on the brain. However, this time it is brown-eyed babe's turn. A small family get-together. Nothing fancy. Her birthday is this Wednesday, so I will be getting her a cupcake let her go to town, taking pictures galore of her munching away with her little party hat on. Then this weekend she will be going on her first "Girls in the City" trip with me, my sister and mom. She will be taken on her first truly girly shopping excursion. Bloomingdales and Tiffany's. Oh yes, 'tis the holiday season in the city. We girls will be spending the night in the city and then my brother and dad will be joining us for brown-eyed babe's birthday lunch on Sunday.

Last month, grasshopper challenged me to participate in National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) and I failed miserably. I started off so well. I was so motivated. But inevitably, I crashed and burned. Not as bad as her, though. Haha. Alas, I squeezed a good 3,000 words out of this brain of mine.

I was accepted into the AmeriCorps program. I start next month working at an adult literacy program for the San Jose Public Library. So, I am stoked about that. Between AmeriCorps, my current job and raising brown-eyed babe the law school admissions folk should be able to forgive my dismal senior year grades, right?

And my books, oh my books. This weekend, I finished The Kindergarten Wars by Alan Einsenstock. I found it absolutely fascinating. It made me feel like less of a loser for fretting about brown-eyed babe's education before she has even hit the year mark. I want for her to go to great schools, but I sure as heck don't want to be paying half a million before she even makes it to college. Egad.

In blue-eyed boy news (he is no longer a babe to me), he is planning on arriving next week for a visit. Why after 6+ months has he decided to fly across the country? Because his new girlfriend is paying for it. Yes, his new girlfriend. She is paying for him to come home with her for the holidays to meet her family. So, his trip isn't even about coming to see brown-eyed babe. Visiting her is just something that he "should" do while he is in the town.

I am irked beyond belief.